Set Your Intentions #8

What I would really like said about me is that I dared to love.  By love I mean that condition in the human spirit so profound it encourages us to develop courage and build bridges, and then to trust those bridges and cross the bridges in attempts to reach other human beings.     
                             - Maya Angelou

Rest

My word for 2012 was Filter. You can read about it Here. Last year my word was Carve. Read about that Here. I was starting to wonder what my word for 2014 was going to be and even thought of not doing it this year at all.


And then these Tweets happened:

Marty Stevens @martylstevens     I am on the shelf for a few weeks from running due to tearing my inguinal tendon. #500in2014 Any suggestions for a speedy recovery?  Jessica Lahey @jesslahey   @martylstevens rest, rest, rest and more rest. That's a painful one! Good luck!

So, now my Word for 2014 is a no brainer.  It absolutely, positively, without a doubt has to be Rest. Thanks, Jess, for pointing out what seems so obvious, but was not what I was wanting to do--REST

Letting my injury heal is front and center at the moment.  (A group of Educators have taken up the challenge to run 500 miles in 2014.  It is inspirational and they provide wonderful support.  However, I am woefully behind due to this setback. I will need all their encouragement once I return.  Watch our progress on Twitter at #500in2014).

After I recover and can get back to running, then I need to be especially mindful to Rest.  It seems from the moment I awake to the time my head hits the pillow I am in full throttle motion without a moment to myself. Rest to rejuvenate. To recalibrate. To replenish. Mostly, though, Rest just for the sake of Rest.

The Invisible Boy And The Need To Be Appreciated And Accepted

Trudy Ludwig. 

She is a Hero of mine. 

There was a time when I admired athletes, movie stars, and musicians.  Not anymore.  Now I most admire KidLit authors and illustrators.  Trudy is probably on my Mount Rushmore of children's authors.

She has a new book, The Invisible Boy.  You should read it.  If you are a parent it should be on your bookshelf. If you are an Educator of any kind-- Teacher, Librarian, School Counselor--you must have access to it at your school. It needs to be in your hands and the hands of your students.

 

Every young person needs to experience a true sense of belonging. Every young person needs to feel valued. Every young person needs to BE appreciated and accepted for who they are. No. Matter. What.  Trudy's book addresses these important issues of Being.

 

So, what's the book about?  Read about it here.  And here.  Here, too.

This activity guide from Peace First may further help to foster a more complete understanding:  Inclusion/Exclusion.

There are lots of adults out there who are like the character in The Invisible Boy.  A book by Susan Cain may enhance your awareness-- Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking.

The invisible boy and others like him are easy to overlook or dismiss or disregard.  Please do not do that.  Start by reading The Invisible Boy.  It will move you to make a difference in someone's life.

 

How Do You Suck?

 

Do you suck out all the marrow of Life?

 

(Click here to see the entire Thoreau quote).

 

 

 

 

                   Or do you suck all the energy from a room?

 

 

 

 

Filter

Filter. 

That is the word I chose to reflect the way I want to live in 2012. 

Why Filter?  Some foods have been giving me wicked headaches and I decided it was high time to be mindful of what I put in my body.  Food-related headaches were wiping me out.

As I pondered this I also decided to Filter what/how I thought and the manner in which I spoke as well.  Sometimes I find myself fretting over that which I have no control.  Other times I found myself wanting to be more mindful with how my words were being received by others. 

Filter seemed to be a good fit for the word I selected to emulate in the the year 2012.

So,  as Fate would have it, just as I began to acquire a comfort level with my blogging voice and used that as a springboard to Twitter and picked Filter as my word for 2012 you will never guess what happened next. I was diagnosed with left vocal fold paralysis.  I literally lost my voice. 

No one wants to hear the word paralysis applied to oneself. 

Not ever.

This got my attention.

On the day of my diagnosis, I came home to find this on my NPR feed:  How My Voice Went Silent.

What a coincidence.  The same day I learn of my left vocal fold paralysis an NPR reporter writes an article about his own diagnosis with it.  Small world. The timeliness of reading his article was uncanny and helped so much to realize I was not the only one to experience such a thing.

Naturally, going though something like this provided the opportunity for me to learn about myself very quickly.  There is no ignoring or putting it off for later.  One thing I learned-- no matter how I try, I do not think I truly appreciate something until I no longer have it.  Everyone is probably like that.  I took my voice for granted-- the sound of it, the laugh, a whisper, a shout, everything...

Another thing I learned, crazy as it seems, is I did not worry over it.  It did not cause me to be afraid.  Nor did I have any anger regarding it. I accepted it from the get-go. That definitely helped me to move forward.

My word for the year is playing a part in my Voice coming back.  I Filtered-out the words and patterns of habit that could be unhealthy and negative and Filtered-in thoughts and beliefs that were positive and healing.  It is definitely an on-going challenge, but one that is making me better.  Isn't that what it is all about? 

What is your word for 2012 and how is it progressing thus far for you?  If you have yet to select your word I encourage you to do so. It could make all the difference.

Unexpected, Yet Perfect

Several years ago I was teaching a lesson to a class.  It was a disaster.  At least that was my initial assessment. The class was off-task in every way.  If I remember correctly it was snowing outside and we were preparing for an early dismissal.

I was exasperated and my patience box was empty.  I recall giving my “I’m disappointed in you” speech and instructing the class to be silent for the remaining five minutes.  To coin a phrase, it was one of those days.

The following week when I had that class again several hands were immediately raised.  When called upon, a student requested if they could do what they did last week.  I was perplexed.  What could this student possibly be referring to?  Last week was something I wanted to move on from.  However, in an effort to learn from the previous lesson, I asked what was it that we did which was so enjoyable.  The response was unexpected, yet perfect.  The student told me he wanted to sit absolutely still.  When probed further, other students echoed this sentiment.  “Yeah, it was relaxing” and “It gave me a chance to think about my day” and “I like listening to my own breath.”  How cool is that!?

Essentially, they were asking to be in the moment; fully present and engaged.  Not distracted.  Not impulsive.  Not off task.  From then on I have incorporated that type of activity into many lessons.  It teaches them to be more aware of themselves and how they are connecting to the process of learning.

After that I found something called, The Kid's Yoga Deck.  It includes easy to use strategies which promote concentration and focus.  I have also found that these exercises help kids to pay attention to how their body responds to stressful situations.  It is empowering for young people to be attuned to their mind and body.
What unexpected, yet perfect outcomes have you experienced in your own life?

I Will Strive

Someone once told me that Persistence and Perseverance are omnipotent.  With that in mind, I have decided what to Strive for in 2012.

I will strive to help Educators get actively engaged with Twitter.  In the short time I have been with TwitterNation it has altered my perception in a Good and Profound way.  And, it is the best source of Professional Growth and Development there is to offer. 

I will charge forward with a full head of Motivation to pursue my return to running.  I've been away from it for many years and am finding that I genuinely enjoy this form of exercise.  Besides, it is excellent for maintaining positive well-being.

I  vow to BE THERE in each moment with mindful awareness for my family.  When I caught myself spacing-out over stuff at work as I was saying prayers and tucking my kids into bed I knew the jig was up. 

That is my list.  I am not going to ponder it.  Nor am I going to talk about it.  I am just going to Strive to Do it.  Any Encouragement you can offer will be appreciated!  Please check in with me from time to time.

Here is to a Healthy, Abundant New Year.

Watch and Learn

For those of you familiar with my blog, you are aware that from time to time these posts are inspired by my own children.

This would be one of them.

My daughter rode a Boogie Board for the first time this Summer.  Turns out she was good.  Quite good, actually. 

Here is what I learned from watching her...

Patience
Know when to wait and let it come to you.  No need to rush and expend energy unnecessarily.

Anticipate.
Be mindful.  Study the situation.  Know your surroundings.  Sense the moment.  Let yourself be guided by your instincts.

Act
Be attentive. Be aware.  Know when to seize the moment.  Own it.

Flow
Ever do something you really truly enjoy?  It is not a chore to do.  Nor is it something you have to do.  Rather, it is just something that has become a part of you.  Time stands still, yet seems to fly by at the same time.  (There is a book about just this thing.  Check it out--Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience.  And this one too--Creativity: Flow and the Psychology of Discovery and Invention).

These things -patience, anticipation, action, and flow- helped my daughter at riding the waves.  They definitely assist me in my work as a School Counselor, not to mention being called Dad.  How about you?  What lessons have come to help you in your life?

The Right Word

The difference between the right word and almost the right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.  -Mark Twain

Some days I hear words that just plain make me wince and hurt my ears.  And I make my living in a school. This makes me sad.

So, I am compelled to offer this to the blogosphere. 

The next time you find yourself on the verge of scolding a student, bite your tongue.  Filter yourself for just a second or two.  Three would be even better.

Before ordering a student what not to do, take a deep cleansing breath.  In fact, take two.  Three would be perfect.  Then, let the student politely know what she/he can do.

Prior to punishing students for not following a rule which they should most likely already know, press the pause button.  Instead, try looking them in the eyes with compassion, and smile.  One or two pats on the back might be just the thing.  Three would do the trick, for sure.  Then give them a do-over and brainstorm a better, more appropriate choice together.

Do you ever hear words that make your ears hurt?  What do you do when that happens?

Words really do make a difference.  The right word at the right moment has the potential to make all the difference in the world.  Tread lightly with your words.  It will be sweet music to everyone's ears.

Being Mindful

That's my son in the photo.  Look at those footprints.  One after the other.  Step. Step. Step.  Each one is with determined focus and careful intention.  He has not yet learned about hurry.  No way, not him.  I hope he never does.  Each stride leaves an imprint of exploration, discovery, and wonder. 

Step. Step. Step. 

As for me?  Well, I am a different story.  Sometimes I catch myself rushing through the hallways here at school.  You know how it is, places to be and people to see.  In such a hurry I am not mindful. Nor am I fully present.  That is definitely not purposeful.  After all, how good of a counselor can I be if I am not completely focused on and fully engaged with whomever I am meeting.

During these moments I make a deliberate effort to slow down.

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

Smile.

Go easy.

Doing those simple things makes a significant difference.  I feel better– my body is no longer tense and my mind is uncluttered.  Thus, I am in a better place to help those who need me.

When you find yourself shaken like a Snow Globe what do you do to settle yourself?