Set Your Intentions #9

When a flower does not bloom, you fix the environment in which it grows, not the flower.    -Alexander Den Heijer

Words for 2013

Obviously I am reporting back later than I had originally intended,  That happens sometimes.  Especially when your word for the year was CARVE.  I have been putting forth a sincere effort to CARVE space for all that is important to me. Here is my One little word post for 2013-- CARVE. With the start of a new school year underway and heading into the home stretch of 2013 I am being extra mindful to follow the Intentions I set back in January.

Some folks in my PLN also picked their word for the year:

Celina Brennan BELIEVE
Ann Ottmar VOICE
Jeff Delp TODAY
Lyn Hilt BEGINNINGS

I also put out a call to authors to choose a word for the year and share it with me. Here are their Words:

Julia Cook TRY
Peter Reynolds TRANSCEND
Trudy Ludwig REACH

Heather Frederick DIVE
Susan Hill Long OVER.

So, everyone, I hope your Word has lived up to your expectations and I trust you found the meaning in your Word which you set your intentions for.  Report back to us and share how your special word has impacted your life. And, if you have yet to find a Word for yourself it is never too late.

Carve

Last year I came across the One Word Challenge-- a word that encapsulates how you want to live and who you want to be.   For 2012 my word was Filter.

I am having a bit of a time pinpointing a word for 2013.  There are a lot of words percolating within me:  Gratitude. Easy. Time. Mindful. Breathe.Willingness. Capacity. Transition. Remember.

All good words, all words that would do me good as a point of focus.  All words I will be mindful of as I navigate 2013.  However, the word for me this year is Carve.

Carve time for family.  For friends.  For my profession/right livelihood.  For me. 

I recently took a wood carving class.  It was a fun thing for me to do, as well as an important creative outlet.

It was difficult, though, as it removed me from my comfort zone.  I am a big advocate of Malcom Gladwell and his referencing of the 10,000 Hour Rule.  School counseling is like the back of my hand.  Wood carving, on the other hand, is something where I am a true rookie.  I have logged about 40 hours.  10,000 is a long way away.  So, I hope to continue to practice the art of carving.  I believe it will be a valuable tool for me to be nurturing and understanding to those I encounter on their own journey toward Mastery.

I need to be mindful to Carve out time for my kids.  They are seven and have entered the stage of their lives where they are involved with lots of activities:  soccer, ballet, art, swimming, and on and on.  It can be a hectic schedule.  It seems as if my kids were just born and here they are becoming their own people.  I am so very proud, but I still need to Carve a space for just me and them where there are no outside distractions.

And my wife!  So much of our time is devoted to being Parents and Educators. It can be exhausting.  I definitely need to Carve out more Date Nights with her. 

Professionally, there are times when I am assigned a not so desirable task. I will strive to use this less then ideal situation and Carve it into something workable and to which I can take ownership.

I need to Carve time for myself, too.  I am not much good to others in my life, professionally or personally, if I lose sight of this.  So, it will be important to Carve a niche just for me.

I like the word Carve because it reminds me to be an active participant in life.  Sometimes, a mindset develops that stuff happens to you.  I suppose stuff does happen to you, however, it is how I respond to the stuff that matters.  Mostly, it will mean making space for that which matters most to me and whittling away that which is an impediment. I hope to do a lot of Carving this year to positive, healthy results.

If you have not picked a word for 2013 I encourage you to give it a try. Here are a few folks from my PLN who did--  Jeff Delp, Lyn Hilt, Ann Ottmar, and Celina Brennan. Click on their names to see their word. Perhaps, by reading about their Word for 2013 they can serve to jump start and inspire you.  Add your Word to the comments below.

I wish you well for 2013.

Set Your Intentions #4

“Each second we live is a new and unique moment of the universe, a moment that will never be again.  And what do we teach our children? We teach them that two and two make four, and that Paris is the capital of France. When will we also teach them what they are? We should say to each of them: Do you know what you are? You are a marvel. You are unique. In all the years that have passed, there has never been another child like you. Your legs, your arms, your clever fingers, the way you move. You may become a Shakespeare, a Michelangelo, a Beethoven. You have the capacity for anything. Yes, you are a marvel. And when you grow up, can you then harm another who is, like you, a marvel? You must work, we must all work, to make the world worthy of its children.”

                                 ~ Pablo Picasso

Set Your Intentions #3

“I've come to the frightening conclusioin that I am the decisive element in the classroom. It's my daily mood that makes the weather. As a teacher, I possess a tremendous power to make a child's life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration. I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis will be escalated or de-escalated and a child humanized or de-humanized.” -Dr Haim Ginott


Click here to see Set Your Intentions #1.   And here for Set Your Intentions #2

Would you like this poster?  You can download your own right here.  This came from the latest issue of Teaching Tolerance.

Friends and Flowers

In a way, nobody sees a flower, really, it is so small, we haven't time-- and to see takes time, like to have a friend takes time. -Georgia O'Keeffe

Coming from her, that is quite a statement.  A powerful, humbling one.  After all, she is Georgia O'Keeffe-- the artist who made us all look at flowers like never before.

We cannot see every flower we come across, can we?    It is true-- flowers are small.  She knew that and so she painted them huge.  That is what Georgia O'Keeffe saw and she made it her own.  Of course, we took notice. 
Still, there are some flowers you find yourself noticing more than others.  Maybe a Jack-in-the-Pulpit tickles your fancy.  Or the fragrance of Lilly-of-the-Valley floats your boat. Whatever it may be, you have taken the time to notice.

The part that interests me, though, is her belief of how to have a friend takes time.  We cannot become friends with every person we come across, can we?  What do you notice in a person that compels you to reach out and begin to form a friendship?  How does it develop for you?  What do you do to nurture a friendship?

These Jack-in-the-Pulpit paintings were created in 1930.  That got me thinking.  Georgia O'Keeffe did not have Twitter or Facebook. I find myself conflicted. Does having a friend mean posting on Facebook and maintaining connections with friends?  I have some friends that I have not seen for ages and ages, but I am able to stay connected to them with the immediacy of the Internet.  Or is it necessary to be intimate and face-to-face? After all, sometimes more is communicated by what is left unspoken.  And, this can only be observed in a personal encounter.  How do you weigh in on this?

No matter the time, 1930 or 2011, I suppose what this speaks to are the intentions you set and how you go about your business of living-- and connecting.

Are You At Your Best?

When I was a counseling student, my professor, Dr. Kahn, presented the process of change to the class by way of an activity.  It went something like this:  Consider how Man/Woman is at his/her Best.   Below are my personal reflections.  Before you read mine you may want to make a list for yourself.

I like to think people are at their Best when they are relaxed, hopeful, optimistic, accepting, aspiring, goal-setting, and forward moving.  Also, when one is self-aware, maintains objectivity and has a developed sense of belonging.  Of course, I am at my best when my sense of humor is intact and there is an easiness to my laughter.  And something else which I have found to be very important, for me, is to be able to tap into creativity and possibility.

Next, he continued, think how Woman/Man is at their Worst.  Again, jot down your own list before reading on.

At their Worst, I find people are anxious, irritable, inflexible, and clenched.  Further, when they posses an external locus of control, are full of duplicity, in a state of chronic dread or apathy, and a naysayer.

To complete the activity,  Dr. Kahn had us ponder Change:  What makes it ripe to occur?  What nudges us in order to allow Change to take place?  What gets you from here to there, from Point A to Point B, from unhappy to happy?

For me, the answer to this is open-mindedness, using trial and error, being diligent, and having perseverance. In addition, I find change is more apt to happen by having a coach or mentor, working/socializing in a collegial atmosphere, as well as surrounding myself with like-minded or open-minded people.  Lastly, of course, there is love.  The ability to feel the love of others and express love to others can move mountains.

How are you at your best?  How are you at your worst or most unbecoming?  What gets you unstuck and how does this happen?  Think about it and let me know how the process of change works for you.
Personal Note:  To this day, Dr. Kahn has a strong pull on how I pursue the Art of Being a Counselor.  He was big on the ABC's of counseling.  I think there is a blog post about this in my future.